Getting Ahead

Get ahead has been our mantra for generations. Parents want advantage for their children, every possible advantage. We start them early in academics, sports, beauty pageants, music, entertainment. Achievement is good, and providing well for a child means giving him what he needs to excel in his life. Except, will it really be early learning, prowess in sports or music, or social status that makes this happen? The clamour for formulas that make us rich, strong, successful, happy, and sexy is off-the-charts. That's why the books, pills, dating aids, clinics, TV shows, are making money and lots of it. There is nothing wrong with achievement or rising above the pack. Most people just want the little bit they think will bring them joy and happiness. We all should be happy! The reason we all aren't can be found in what we think will bring it about.

If any of these ideas actually worked, we would have already seen the frenzy taper off. People would be satisfied and feeling rosy. Instead, the frenzy snowballs because the goods don't deliver and people believe the hype about the next promotion guaranteeing results. I and most of the parents I know value character above things as we raise our children. But honestly, I am sure character alone won't last. I say that because often what is perceived to be character is just learned behavior which is easily corrupted. I suspect generations will be bankrupt failing to grasp a simple truth.

Consider it's not already obvious—how fast you run, how much your car costs, how sexy you are does not bring you joy or distinguish you from anyone else. Imagine the opposite is true? What if by your joy you are distinguished! What if joy and happiness gets us ahead, rather than the getting ahead that brings us joy? Pleasant as it is to be profoundly sexy or smart or strong, what if a deeply rooted moral compass—rooted in your emotions not just your memory—is the secret to joy. Imagine. What you love and what you hate holds the key to your joy and subsequently how you measure up to your peers. How easy it that?